This year has not exactly been the least stressful of years. It’s not that I avoid stress – much of my personality thrives off pressure and keeping myself busy almost to the point of being overwhelmed. I honestly wouldn’t know how to function any other way. But recently life has handed me a few more unexpected things to deal with. Words like hospital and surgery have made my stomach drop. Communication break downs have left me unsettled. The simple act of being present as a wife and mother has become difficult and fills me with guilt. That last one really gets me because at the end of the day all I want is to be there for the people I love most. All I want is for them to know that they deserve my undivided attention because they fill my heart with indescribable joy and are the reason every day is worth waking up.
Basically I am finding myself looking for some relief from all this worry and stress. Focusing on work (which I love), exercising, reading – the old standbys are not doing the trick. On one of my sleepless nights I was perusing Pinterest and landed on a garden planted in a shoe holder. For some reason that pin instantly spoke to me – I needed to have that hanging garden on my porch and I needed to take a chunk out of my Saturday with my family to do it (even though it was already reserved for a mountain of work of course). The project was inexpensive, quick and simple but honestly those weren’t the reasons this had to be done. From the shopping trip for the supplies to the first watering I felt fulfilled. Not one who meditates I do love the concept of it – this past Saturday was my version of meditating. Clearing my mind, focusing on the present and finding myself lost in my daughter’s joy over the smell of flat leaf parsley was all I needed to lift that enormous weight off my tired shoulders. Maybe not forever but at least for the time being which is more than good enough. The best part about this humble little garden is every time I leave or enter our home I am reminded of the relaxing day with my family. Of course the yummy herbs are an added bonus but even if they are wilted by Memorial Day this was not a waste of time. This was time well spent as far as my soul is concerned.